Big Tits And The Job Market

When you've got huge smokin' tits, you're wise to use them to your benefit, right? Wave 'em in a cop's face will get you out a speeding ticket, you never have to buy yourself a drink, and there's plenty of "customer service" jobs which pay nicely for your personal assets. The young lady below is an employee of "Smokin' Em Charters," a boating company that provides plenty of eye-candy for their customers. Problem is, she augments her real job by teaching gradeschool on the side. For some reason, parents don't like the idea of an attractive woman teaching their kids...the idiots.


If she's teaching something that's not in the textbook, then there's a problem -- who gives a rat's ass where she bounces her boobies? Oh, the kids are "learning" things from her that shouldn't be taught in school. Let's take all the Christians out of the teaching profession; their off-duty activities are against my moral fiber...oh, wait, that isn't going to fly with the moral influencers, is it?

Oh, and if you want 12 other nicely-posed views of this hottie's tits, the news article slideshow is more than happy to give you a good look.

Ann-Angel Gets Clean

I've seen this Ann-Angel set before, and I still love taking a few minutes to admire her:

Topless Massage In London

The best I can date this is around 1977 to 1978, after the release of "Come Play With Me" but before the star's death -- however, the biggest attraction in London for pervs like me wasn't the movie: the UK magazine New Action MS had these ads for "topless massage," assumedly with a happy ending (so to speak). The ads are quite detailed and explicit, as opposed to the entendre-laden all-text personal ads that advertise naughty massage today. Nicole Sauna is the only one still partaking in toplessness, now called Rio's, and New Park Sauna gave up the toplessness to became the Manor Park Sauna; the rest have closed and moved on.

The Boob Tube?

If you spend too much time just playing with the knobs, you're gonna miss Car Talk, I can guarantee it. The boobs themselves are rather small and stylized, which, I suppose, is OK for a radio, and is probably intentional as a way to dissuade people from cradling them too much...I mean, for crying out loud, it's a radio, not some sort of sex toy. Of course, the UK gets all the fun stuff.



via

Clean The Cookie-Duster

If I had a hairy face, I imagine I'd play with it all the time: running my fingers through it, caressing it lovingly, twirling it like some mad scientist. I'd heard of moustache brushes, but I didn't really think of them as fashion until I saw this little doodad, a 'morning cup' moustache brush. I..well, um, I don't really get the whole 'cup' thing, but as a dangle on a chain it is striking. Just don't wear it if you're moustacheless. Then, the subtext is that you're volunteering to brush other people's facial hair, which is just a bit too creepy to be fashionable.

via

Sex And Death, In Pewter

You can actually own one of your own, via the eBay auction that the photo was found in. 11" tall, cast in metal, an intriguing statue of Death, holding and caressing a topless woman. Lucky stiff. via

Tasty Julie Gettin' Soapy

Sure, Julie doesn't do much than caress soap suds onto her body, but...hey -- how is that anything to complain about? My complaint about bath movies is there isn't usually enough soapiness. The video here loops, so you could, quite literally, watch it all day and she doesn't get bath-wrinkly in the least.

Arthur dePins Naughty Illustration

Mr de Pins has a talent: he combines adorably cute with deeply sexy, without getting all creepy about it. The art has an anime-like, cut-paper feel, Powerpuff-Girl-ish roundess and exaggeration, but it all works well together.

Nikky, Waiting For You

Would you leave this beautiful gal just hanging out, all naked and hot, in your living room? I think not -- she looks like she could use some company. That low, flat bench wouldn't be just for sitting; it looks comfy for any number of Nikky-related uses:

Boobies And Linux's Tux

You might argue that linux geeks aren't hot, but you'd be wrong -- sure, like a cross-section of society, some of us are a little funny-looking, but you have to check out the high end of the bell curve: we've got some hotness hiding in our ranks:

(via)

Clothing Color Palettes In The Wild

If you're a bit color-impaired, don't worry, a lot of guys have that problem. Well, yeah, I know there's a lot of guys out there with design degrees, but you've got your Pantone swatches to compare to -- the rest of us need a little help. WearPalletes takes photos of nicely-dressed people, and posts a test-pattern set of color bars taken from the clothes pictured. Some of them strike me as ugly on the person, but the stripes show how the colors work. And, if you fancy yourself a designer, maybe there's something worthwhile to be found in the clothing colors of strangers on the street.

Aside: speaking of Pantone colors: Pantone has released their fall color set, in time for fashion designers to design and produce their stuff in time to be on Wal-Mart's racks by June.

Spray Her And She Gets Horny

Yeah, we'll get out the jokes about the number of men volunteering to squirt ladies with some of their own personal blend, but they've actually been studying what happens to women when you give them a spritz of testosterone. The study found 261 women with diminished libido, and sprayed them with testosterone for sixteen weeks. They found that the women experienced an increased in 'sexually satisfying events.' Sounds like you can bottle up a horny woman and turn her on with a squirt, eight?


It turns out, the women in the placebo group also had an increase in sexually satisfying events. So, it really doesn't matter what you squirt her with, as long as she believes it'll make her more sexually satisfied. For the best sex ever, here's the steps:

1. Convince gal-pal that the bottle contains sex-enhancer;
2. fill bottle with bacon-scented spray;
3. Enjoy bacon and sex simultaneously.

Man, I'm hard as a steel pipe just thinkin' about it.

Iveta And The Looking Glass

Iveta gazes into her looking glass, waiting for a guy like me. Unfortunately, on this side of the mirror I'm a mad hatter , so I suppose the CR/LF on the Wonderland side of the mirror is charming, handsome, and rich. Ah, I can dream about my own fantasy wonderland, too, you know...

Cali Logan, Soapy and Ready

Meet Cali, who made a common mistake of wearing her swimsuit into the bubble bath. Oh, don't worry; she's remedying the situation, and will let you watch to make sure she does it right...and, oh, baby, does she do it right -- both pictures and video are available.

Skin Tight

Next in our history of boner-pleasing, cock-teasing album covers comes this selection from Marty Gold called Skin Tight -- the drums, of course, are the reference intended, right? A naked, hot brunette with a tight ass would have nothing to do with the 'skin' in the title, of course.

I will say, however, out of all the sexy album covers I've done so far (aside from Whipped Cream and Other Delights, which is the greatest album ever), Skin Tight is actually a kick ass album; I recommend it if you find a copy.


And, of course, if you happen across a copy, you can excuse yourself by emphasizing how good the music is -- sure, it's the equivalent of saying you buy Playboy for the articles, but, hell, a little white lie never hurt nobody.


I mean, just look at her -- the jacket, sadly, credits neither the photographer nor the model, but I'd wager it was the best photo shoot ever.

Red and Black

This sweet little gal has a few touches of red: her ruby lips, the flower over her ear, the strands of her hair...the rest is covered in black, but she slowly takes that off in order to give you a taste of a little pink.

lesbian bubble bath video

These two lovely ladies look like they started out with an innocent bubble bath together -- and don't all cooperative baths start out so innocent? -- but, of course, things got way out of hand...however it doesn't look like anybody is complaining.

Diamond Thong And Little Else

This thong has over a hundred thousand dollars worth of diamonds sewn into it -- the outside, of course, but if you're planning on dry-humping this model, it'll cut all the way through your jeans, your boxers, and leave your penis in a sore, sore state.

Naughty Matrioshka Doll

I think we've all seen a matroishka dolls -- they start out big, and as you open them you find smaller and smaller ladies inside, until there's one tiny weeble left inside. These matrioshkas do it one step better: as you peel away layers, the women pained on the dolls peels away her own layers:

Christina Ricci Is Hot. Duh.

Do you doubt it? Christina Ricci is hot as hell. She's got that 'crazy chick' look to her, without actually being a crazy chick, which gives her a Double Yahtzee score when it comes to hotness. Go see more of her here.