Kevin Smith: Perv

In promoting his new movie, Zack and Miri Make a Porno, Kevin Smith has this to say: "I'll go read Google news, I'll go read Guardian UK, go read our Web site, and then if I've got nothing else, I will just peruse the porn sites, because it's an ever-expanding world...Just when you see the most outlandish clip you could ever see, somebody introduces something new. I just check in periodically just to see how far porn has gone in my absence."

Kevin Smith Gets An R

Kevin Smith's new movie, Zack And Miri Make A Porno, just barely snuck by from being called Kevin Smith Makes A Porno -- the rating board nearly wanted to give it an NC-17 due to somewhat explicit sex scenes (as one might see in a porno, I'd guess), but reduced the rating to R based on the comedy of it. Most amusing: one of his justification is that moviegoers unwilling to view people having sex are going to avoid a film with the word "porno" in it (and, if not, are inordinately stupid). I'll wager that many movie theatres will leave 'porno' off the marquee, just to protect people with gentler sensibilities.

Penis Obscuring

Very important information, presented humorously: how to hide your erection from the world. The video would like me to believe that erection-hiding is important to one's social life, but when my bulge extends down to the kneecap in my dungarees, I've decided it's more an asset than a liability. Your mileage may vary.

Movie Stars Porn Connections

Frisky has a fun list of film stars who've got porn connections -- I got really excited at the Thora Birch listing, but, sadly, it's about her parents rather than herself. Oh, well. I guess I'll have to stick to fantasizing that I'm Steve Buscemi in that one scene. Seems I fantasize about being Steve Buscemi more than you'd expect. Anyhow, I think I have an article about an early Coppola porn film in an old skin mag, I'll see if I can get it online this weekend. For now, read the Frisky article.

Sexy Movie Space Babes

Dark Roasted Blend has an excellent set of images documenting hot space babes from film and TV -- and it's not Star-Trek-hottie variety this time. Barbarella, of course, is heavily represented. I never saw U.F.O., but, damn, purple-haired alien chicks are hotter than I expected. We should all savor the 1960s female liberation that defined sexy, huge-breasted women as a sign of a better future!

Buy a Video Camera, Meet A Porn Star

I caught this floating around those 'old ads' newsgroups, so I don't know where it's from, but I couldn't let it go by:

Given its Penthouse tie-in, I assume it was an ad that appeared in that magazine. According to the ad, if you shell out twelve-hundred bucks, you not only get the camera with VTR (no all-in-ones back then), you'll get to meet and film a Penthouse Pet. First, I gotta say 'wow', because it's a far leap from today: buy a Blu-Ray DVD player, get to meet the cast of a hi-def porn film? Conservatives everywhere would freak out -- DVDs are for proper family fun, not watching porn, right? Back in the seventies, Akai knew what videotape was for, and the relaxed attitude towards porn was seen as a cultural asset.

That gal in the picture? According to the small text at the bottom, she's Lynn Partington, the Penthouse Pet for December 1971.

Making Naughty Movies

In 1969, Vivitar ran this ad in Playboys -- and while Playboy was naughty, most advertisers played up the suaveness rather than the nudity aspect of the magazine. Vivitar ran with it and worked some female objectification into their ad.


They apply "take charge" in quite a few ways for a little ad. First, the selling point of the camera is that you can plug it in -- give it a 'charge' -- to the wall outlet (as if running out of battery interrupts the chance to stop every 5 minutes to change the film reel). Plus, they say you can "take charge" by seeing more through the viewfinder...but our geeky filmmaker looks like he's going to take charge by spiriting away his sexy subject to the darkroom for a quick fuck. Not that there's anything wrong with that; she looks ready to take whatever he's got in those fine slacks to give her. That's what he needs the AC power for -- plug in the camera, lock the trigger on, and film himself rocking this lady's world. Bully for the horn-dog in nerd-glasses!