Penis Tattoo: Useful!

If you've ever wondered why guys get penis tattoos, here you go: A gentleman has been cleared on indecent exposure charges, because he had a penis tattoo, the indecent penis did not. The accusers said nothing appeared different or odd about the penis that had been exposed on the train, but when Mr. Penis Dragon whipped his out for the courts (er, I bet it was more low-key than that), he showed his penis was anything but normal. So, men, run out today and get tattoos on your penises: it'll make sure you avoid various sex-offender crimes. Just remember it'll make you easier to catch if you do decide to show off your tattoo in public.

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Carved After A Fuck!

I missed this a couple weeks ago: after having a drunken one-night stand, a guy woke up to find that the woman left more than just emotional scars. His temporary lover had carved his skin, leaving a star on his back, along with smaller marks on his arms. The thought, "I'm going to slice up my sleeping partner" doesn't generally go through my head, let alone after sex, but then I'm also not getting really drunk and having one-night stands while during my blackout stupor. She claims he asked her to do it, which I think is more likely than the courts thought; he's lucky his drunken mind didn't make him say, "why not just cut off my balls and blend them into a frappe". ! There's always next weekend for the newly-tattooed guy, I guess.

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Sadie's Bathtime Visitor

Sadie just can't have a relaxing bath on her own - she's soaking away, enjoying the bubbles caressing her tits, when a guy with a big cock shows up...she can't just ignore it, can she?



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Rainbow Brite Has Snapped

Distraught upon finding out that Red Butler has been fucking Patty O'Green the whole time, Rainbow Brite came completely unhinged: it is rumoured that her rampage also took the lives of Strawberry Shortcake, Teddy Ruxbin, and three Care Bears:



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Tattooed Lady Gallery

Letters on the knuckles and blurry blue teardrops on your cheeks do not a tattoo make: here's 19 pretty gals made surprisingly more beautiful with tattoos:



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Punk Threesome Bathtime

OK, there's nothing worse than an unorganized group bubble bath - what they need is somebody to be in charge, and I'm the dick to do it. First: pissed-looking-girl-with-the-puffies, you eat out scared-looking-exotic-girl-with-the-tattoo. Next, pink-haired-pierced-chick, stick that ass in the air, because I'm fucking you from behind while I watch the other two. See, was that so complicated? It's sure a good thing I was here.



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